Meditation is a pathway into consciousness. There is a silence within, a tremendous joy and gratitude that is your nature.
As long as you keep on looking on the outside for happiness it will not last. You will only go from one thing to another, but never reach tranquility.
The only thing that can give you lasting sattisfaction is your own inner peace, that only results from being with yourself without any distraction.
This is meditation and it is by no means easy as it goes against all we´ve learned.
Therefore it can be seen as well as some form of unlearning, shedding old conditioning that keeps you confined in unserving patterns of the past. Thus you have to go again and again through the same undesirable experiences.
This can stop now by turning the light of your awareness inside, accepting whatever the moment has to offer. Be it pain or pleasure you sit with it. You simply notice it and be aware of it. The present moment is as it is and it is happening anyways. What benefit but suffering will you gain by resisting it?
Simply allowing what is, to take place however, is the most difficult thing to do, as we are so used to do all kinds distractions when unpleasent thoughts and emotions surge up. Funny enough the emotions and thoughts will evaporize in the light of your consciousness, when you look at them. That is the only way to be free and feel some peace of mind. As more you resist the more those feelings persist.
Therefore stop seeking outside, turn within and claim your birthright.