The inner child
Your life is not comminmg from your conscious wishes, but from programming and therefore you don´t create it. 95 % of our mind is programmed and worse more than 70% of it is disempowering. The function of the mind is however to create coherence between your believes and reality. If your believes are disempowering so will be your reality.
When we are small children the rational mind is not yet developed. Therefore we are very vulnerable and experience emotions full on.The child has not learned how to deal with them and goes almost automatically into repression. By doing that it is not only rejecting an emotion but also a part of itself. This part then brakes away from the conscious and as we grow up it gets locked in our pain body as disempowering beliefs who rule our relationships, income etc. The road to suffering and into mediocrity is established.
Many of our childhood traumas we can´t even remember, like the experience of birth that leaves an intense impression of pain. Indeed entering a cold, hostile world after grwoing in the shelter of the mother´s womb is painful. But not only birth but also our parents blackmailing, shouting etc. leaves marks.
Such traumas are not stored in the mind as it has not yet developed at that time of early childhood. Instead it leaves knots/blockages within the body. As adults we experience shame, guilt, a lack of self love, trust, neediness and many other unpleasant sensations in due to those. This again shapes our reality of day to day life.
Worse, when we are children we even take responsibility for the misbehaviour of our parents. When they shout at us, argue with each other or even brake up, we believe that we are the cause of all that. Understand that it is not and never was your fault. Your parents still most of the time didn´t know better themselves and acted from their own backround of experiences, their pain body. Thus acting from a place of hurt, from the wounded inner child, they passed their diseases unto us.
This is not an excuse to repeat unhealthy behaviour, but a chance to see that you are most of the time acting out suppressed pain of your inner child. Thus you can regain control and responsibility by adressing and meeting your inner child as well as by changing your way of thinking. You can stop living in the troubled world of a victim and create a life of happiness and joy.
Therefore ask yourself:
Where does the energy of your thinking go?
What do you believe about the world and yourself?
What emotions and thoughts shape your life?
Now not being a child anymore stop rejecting unpleasant emotions. Whenever strong fears, anger or hurt come up, experience them fully. With that allow yourself to forgive yourself and others – this can be truly liberating.
To recondition your relationship to your parents and access your inner child, try out thids one:
Find a person you trust. He or she is acting as your mother and after a while as your father . You on the other hand try to sink back into your childhood emotions connected to your parents, closing your eyes for a moment. Then after a while you start to speak from the perspective of your hurt, inner child, addressing what you would have wanted from them and where you felt your needs were not met. Thus honestly addressing your needs, parts of the pain body are resolved and forgiveness becomes possible.
If you can, if your parents are still alive and you find it feasable to do so, you might as well tell your parents. That can have huge healing benefits.
This was day 2 of the breathwork workshop.